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Helping People Tip Toward a Growth Mindset
It is really exciting to learn about the concept of a growth mindset at first; it makes so much sense! "Yes! When we believe we can improve, we take action to do so, and we get smarter - we change. It's so simple!"
Except it isn't. At some point, we find ourselves thinking, but wait a minute. If it's this simple, why is it that I know so many people who do not change at all? And how come, even when we share growth mindset concepts with some people, it does not seem to make any difference? What is going on here?
It might be easy at that point to blame the fixed mindset, label the person and move on. But that doesn't have to be our choice, and it certainly isn't tapping into our own growth mindsets to take that tact.
There are good reasons why many people are not changing much. Here are four reasons that I've learned about. Later I will share what these look like and what can be done about it.
"One thing you need to know is that they are really chatty," said the teacher's email. I'd been invited to do a demonstration lesson in a 5th grade class. Previously, I had asked the teacher about the logistics of her classroom (SMART board? yes. Popsicle sticks? yes. Rows or paired seating? chatty.).
"OK," I thought, "I guess I need to teach them my strategies." I went through my mental rolodex of classroom management acronyms, picked one and made a poster.
On the demonstration day, I located the 5th grade class at the assembly. The teacher smiled and waved at me, and we walked to the room along with the rest of the class. She stopped me before we all went in. "They are really bad," she quietly apologized. "Do you want me to help you?" I looked at the line of children in front of me, thinking "I wonder which of these kids is the toughest?"
I went to work: I watched how they entered the room and I made mental notes: Who had influence with his peers? Who had a desk facing AWAY from the front of the room? Who was sitting alone? Who had a Peanuts Pig Pen-style ring of trash and muck around her desk? Then I went into the room. But I didn't begin the lesson. Instead, I began connecting.
We lead because we have a passion for our work. But leading in a complex system can get confusing, overwhelming, and discouraging sometimes. Rather than resort to seductively easy ways to manage there are times we can choose to truly lead, capture people's hearts, and reignite passion!
I guest-teach in an intervention class twice a week and my partner always tells the students: "You can choose the behavior, but what you cannot choose is the consequences of that behavior." This absolutely applies to leaders as well. In school improvement, decision-making that results in change is very challenging to execute. Plus, that challenge is compounded by the sheer number of decisions that we must make every day.
Understandably, sometimes we aren't making the most growth-minded choices. After all, we still have to get the work done! Leaders often have to make strategic choices in managing and leading because decisions need to be made, deadlines met, and students placed in classes. At the same time, it is important to know the consequences of those choices. If leaders are hyper-aware of the likely consequences of their decisions, then a fixed-minded choice can be turned in to a growth minded one at a later date, upon reflection, and with a cooler head.
Sometimes you just have to jump out the window and grow wings on the way down." – Ray Bradbury
What is a perfectionist?
Recently, Dr. Dweck did a talk in London for The School of Life and she took the audience on a deep dive into the concept of perfectionism: is it a vice or a virtue? This talk really resonated with me as I come from a home of highly driven people. I think everyone in my family would characterize themselves as perfectionists.
It turns out that this may be the case in many families. A colleague of Dweck's, Pam Scott, gave adults a survey to find out if they felt they were perfectionists and if so, how they felt about it. Many adults agreed that they were perfectionists, but they had very different feelings and responses about what that meant.
"It's about fear of chaos," one person said. Another worried that "I am not good enough." A third said, "I need to do things perfectly the first time." Like Mary Poppins, these folks were trying to maintain a "practically perfect in every way" reputation. This type of perfectionism can be debilitating, especially if your best isn't good enough, or if you do not have the time or resources to do your best.
But there was also a very different set of responses.
"It got me where I am today." Now, this response doesn't sound like it is describing a vice; the tone sounds almost proud. Another said, "I am known for high standards and excellent work, why would I ever stop using this tool (perfectionism)?" A third said, "I can't stop until I've done it right."
According to Dweck, the research says there might be two kinds of perfectionism, and those two ways of behaving have drastically different outcomes for people both in accomplishing their goals and in how they feel about themselves. One kind of perfectionist tends to agree with statements like: "People will think less of me if I make a mistake;" and, "A partial failure is as bad as a complete failure." Another kind of perfectionist agrees with these statements: "I try to do my best in everything I do." "I am driven to be excellent." "I strive for high standards." In these responses we can hear echoes of the person-focused vs. process-focused fixed and growth mindsets.
Is Perfectionism a growth-minded or fixed-minded trait?
"I had to start shrinking my world to maintain [perfection]." – Carol Dweck
Dweck frames perfectionism in the context of the two mindsets. First, a fixed mindset is a belief that personal qualities, talents, and intelligence are fixed. What someone has is all s/he will ever have. And, people worry, "Do I have enough?" In a growth mindset, on the other hand, people believe that those talents, personal qualities and intelligence can be developed through effort, mentoring, and practice. These folks don't believe that everyone is exactly the same, but that we can all grow and achieve a high standard.
These two perfectionist belief systems can have very different results. When a person strives for perfection to avoid judgment (fixed minded) the results make that behavior look more like a vice when compared to those who strive for perfection for themselves. The anxiety that the first group experiences can sometimes turn into depression. Feeling judged and feeling not good enough can have a negative effect on their other relationships.
On the other hand, those who are pushing themselves to achieve for their own intrinsic drive tend to achieve more, be happier, and feel inspired. This perfectionism sounds more like a virtue.
This is not to say that working for your own inner drive means that no one will judge you or that you won't fail. But it might mean that you are more resilient in the face of that judgment. What's more, it probably means you are able to reach higher levels of achievement because of your ability to make and learn from mistakes, failures and feedback from others.
A fixed minded perfectionist has as a number one goal to look and feel extremely accomplished all the time. S/he wants to make zero mistakes and do "it" perfectly. This can result in the person making choices that are "safe" where s/he can remain perfect and avoid failure. It seems that perfectionism here is largely to do with the desire to have every step of the way in the process be perfect.
If a growth minded person says it's more important to learn, s/he will actually achieve that high accomplishment because that is how one grows - by engaging deeply in a process (and making mistakes). This perfectionism is about producing an end-product that represents perfection. The process to get there is a learning, iterative, and persistent process until excellence is reached.
Dweck says, "Everything important in life requires huge amounts of effort over long periods of time. If effort makes you feel inadequate... you are at a huge disadvantage." If our culture expects (or even just hopes for) perfect, effortless achievement, when things get hard, we quit. Talent is equated with not having to work hard. The thing is, things always get harder.
What can growth and fixed-minded perfectionism look like in schools?
At Sci Academy, a school in New Orleans, there is a school-wide focus on cultivating growth mindsets in students and staff. Not surprisingly, they have a mission statement shared by the students and staff: Chase Perfection. Catch Excellence. At this school the message is clear: no one is perfect, but we will chase perfection! Through this process, we can achieve excellence. Processing errors provides essential feedback for learning. When we say, mistakes are good, it's not because we want to be sloppy, it means mistakes are normal and we can learn from them!
In Dr. Dweck's experience at the university, she sees a condition of perfectionism that has been dubbed "duck syndrome." When high achieving people think that they have to be perfect all the time, they fail to ask for help when they need it. Or, they may fail to prepare and put in the effort that a task requires, thinking that it should be easy. Like a duck swimming on top of the water, their swimming looks effortless and smooth – almost like floating. But underneath the water, they are paddling madly, trying to stay afloat. For students with duck syndrome, they are struggling and failing privately and not accessing help that they need.
Dweck explains the crux of the issue with this kind of perfectionism: "Errors and setbacks are calamities...people in a fixed mindset run from their errors or hide their errors." This is really tragic when we think about our most accomplished students failing to meet their potential.
"Who will you become?"
Perfectionism, like many personality traits, is only a vice if it actually makes you or other people less happy. Achieving the excellence that the Sci Academy promotes can only happen when someone pushes him or herself every day with an inner drive to produce great (maybe perfect) work.
When I was pregnant with each of my children and when they were newborns, my mother-in-law would say, "I wonder what he will be like? What will Sabine love to do? What funny things will Max say?" Directly to the babies, she would ask, "Who will you become?" Her curiosity and excitement were so sweet to witness. The lesson there is clear: Becoming is better than being. I teach my children to take on a beautiful (effortful) journey of becoming themselves, striving messily for greatness.
About Emily Diehl
Emily Diehl is Director of Professional Learning for Mindset Works and has 16 years experience as a classroom teacher and insructional coach. She works with K-12 educators, school leaders, and parents in helping to develop agency and life-long learning. She has contributed many lessons and experience to the Brainology program.
About Mindset Works
Mindset Works was co-founded by one of the world's leading researchers in the field of motivation, Stanford University professor Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D. and K-12 mindset expert Lisa S. Blackwell, Ph.D. The company translates psychological research into practical products and services to help students and educators increase their motivation and achievement.
Mindset Works and Brainology are registered trademarks of Mindset Works, Inc.
This post was originally published on Houghton Mifflin Harcourt's Blog, The Spark (4.29.2016)
If you have had the pleasure of hearing Carol Dweck speak in the past few months, you will have heard what we have learned in recent years about cultivating a growth mindset in ourselves and in others. One of her slides that really resonated with the audience at the Learning and the Brain conference in San Francisco suggested that adults talk the talk, but don't walk the walk. On a stick figure graphic, a disembodied head is traveling in the opposite direction from its body. And this is a major issue: adults forget that we can't effectively cultivate or influence a growth mindset in others unless we are cultivating one in ourselves. We have to take the journey, walking in the same direction that we are talking.
This couldn't be truer for leaders. Leaders (whether that be by title or merely by influence) can influence the mindsets of other adults. No, you can't change another person. However, you can have great influence over others.